The Falls of FUBAR

Flowing energy rushes toward the edge, a slave to its inevitable fate. It builds and builds and builds some more, unwilling to compromise.

Suddenly, it slips.

For a few precious seconds it suspends high in the air, engaging in a soundless symphony.

Then, it falls.

The finale is deafening, like cymbals clanging against the bottom of an unforgiving pit. This masterpiece draws us in – millions year after year.

Niagara Falls.

Embarking on a road trip to Montreal made this a no-brainer overnight stop for us. Mr. H and I booked a crappy chain hotel on the Canadian side, followed our trusty electronic maps, and strapped Ken Follett the cow in his seat.

ken the cow on the road

Along the way we admired Provence upstate New York…

upstate new york

Ten lengthy hours after leaving Milwaukee, we arrived.

It was dark. And the border crossing at Niagara Falls, Canada was completely FUBAR.

Labor Day weekend. Border strike. FUBAR.

There’s something bittersweet about driving across North America, making it to your destination in decent spirits – cramping with hunger, aching from head to toe, delicates lodged in places – and being trapped with all the other bleary-eyed, naive tourists in this…

traffic at niagara falls

…for a freaking hour.

Naturally, Mr. H. wasn’t havin’ it. I love him even more for rescuing us from our gridlock hell to nowhere. My hero!

Destined to sleep in our truck on the side of a potholed street, we stumbled into a nearby hotel and luckily they were able to accommodate us. (Nothing like flushing money down the shitter on that unreachable hotel on the Canadian side, eh?)

As usual, we made the best of the situation. We lowered our standards and gleefully stuffed our faces in the familiar chain restaurant attached to the joint.

Mediocre fried food. Cold beer. We were saved.

Feeling tipsy, our sanity obviously questionable, we decided to go to the casino across the street to drink our touristy sorrows away and people watch. We’re not gamblers, so this environment fascinates us.

casino
After a while, what initially seemed intriguing became ho-hum, borderline depressing, and our eyes became heavy. So we stumbled back to our hotel, scented with cigarettes and defeat.

The next day, despite our irritation with the whole charade, we went to the damn falls. We were a tough crowd, but Mother Nature won us over with her minxy appeal.

The credit card bill, the slot machines, and the traffic disappeared in that moment.

niagara fallsniagara falls
Niagara Falls…are they really worth it? The blood, the sweat, the tears?

Hell yeah they are!

Gone Road Trippin’

relaxin in the parkMy dear, fantastic, rad, amazing sweet ones…

I will be out of the blogging office starting tomorrow, August 29th. No social media, pix, comments, likes, etc. – I’m going dark.

Mr. H and I will be embarking on a road trip (or, le road trip as we are lovingly calling it) to Montreal. It’s been almost an entire year since I’ve had a vacation.

(Gasp.)

Tell me about it!

I’ll be back on September 10th with some North American tales. In the meantime, stay cool, be cool, and…I’ll miss you guys!

Yours truly,

Britt

The Permanent Book Sale

Hey friends!

Just dropping a quick note to say I have decided to lower the prices on both of my little books to $2.99…permanently! So happy summer reading to you from your indie author pal, Britt.

Everything's Not Bigger Cover

In the heartland of oil money, Jaye Davis spends her whirlwind existence trapped in the battle fields of high fashion. Surrounded by sparkling ambition and plastic perfection, she reluctantly masquerades as a sales drone at Lyman’s, a luxury store in Dallas. After escaping a turbulent past and leaving everything behind, Jaye struggles to find her place in the world. Armed with a quiet determination, she embarks on a solitary quest, searching for certainty in an uncertain future.

But Jaye Davis isn’t her real name–only a byproduct of the witness protection program. Once her fabricated identity is thrown into jeopardy, she flees to the haunting allure of Prague. Unearthing her roots in an important step toward self-discovery, she learns to surrender to the life she truly deserves.

Watch the Inside Look

Buy on Amazon

Beneath the Satin Gloves Cover

A modern day woman, torn by her illusive dreams, awakens to a strange life in 1943, hurdled against the throes of destruction in wartime Berlin. Following a haphazard trail of clues, she discovers her new identity as Alina Feuer, code-named Sparrow, a famous entertainer, seducing a high-ranking SS officer to gather vital information for the Allies.

But, Alina is an amateur in these incessant spy games, relying solely on her wit and instinct to make her next move while frantically hiding her erratic behavior from the watchful eyes of her suspicious liaison/love interest and her pestering socialite gal pal along the way. A reluctant heroine, she must use charismatic glamour as her weapon of choice to fulfill her deadly mission before the week is through.

Watch the Inside Look

Buy on Amazon

My toes are SO famous right now.

sirsasana

No seriously. My toes are SO famous right now.

My good friend at toemail featured my recent post So you want to take a media vacay – along with my toes…naturally. My toes (and I’m hoping my writing) has rounded up over 60 likes already over at their super fun place.

Score!

This is actually the second time my toes have made an appearance over at toemail. Of course that was way back when nobody knew this little blog even existed. My toes have had a rough life, what with being shoved in pointe shoes during my former dancing years and ridiculous high heels countless other years.

Be sure to stop by and give my toes a “like”!

Also, thank you ALL for participating in the Pick Your Favorite Britt Pic poll. There was a tie between two images, so I tinkered with the lighting a bit to marry the two ideas.

The new profile pic you’ll be seeing all over the damn place is this guy…

britt skrabanek

Okie dokie, artichokes. Enjoy your Sundays…eat amazing food, get outside, and hug someone neat!

The Big Character Name Reveal (drum roll, please)

1950s woman in front of window

I know…the suspense is killing you, right?!

Before I reveal the names of two of my main characters, I wanted to take a moment to thank all of you out there for voting and helping out little ole me for my next book endeavor.

I hope you had as much fun with this as I did!

In case you’re just joining the character naming action, I’ve had a poll going all month long for my new project, The Bra Game. You can catch up here.

Without further ado, the winners are…

Character #1

In a Nutshell: Feisty Italian-American Tomboy
Classic Movie Star Twin: Audrey Hepburn
Baseball Position: Catcher, Bunter-Stealer
Occupation: Photographer

…will be named FRAN!!!

Character #2

In a Nutshell: Busty Polish-American Sex Kitten
Classic Movie Star Twin: Marilyn Monroe
Baseball Position: Left Fielder, Left-handed Batter
Occupation: Housewife/Socialite

…will be named EVIE!!!

As there are three main characters, I suppose now is a good time to fill you in on my other character, who I named myself because her name was destined to be.

Character #3

In a Nutshell: Clever All-American Beauty
Classic Movie Star Twin: Grace Kelly
Baseball Position: Pitcher, Home Run Hitter
Occupation: Executive Secretary

…will be named NOLA!!!

Alright back to writing that book! Again, thank you all for your super amazing support and being part of the creation of the little indie book that could.

**A friendly reminder that today is the LAST DAY for you to snatch up both of my books for $1 off on Smashwords before the regular price kicks back in**

All the details are right here.