I’ll Be Happy When…

Finding Happiness

Happiness. We put so much pressure on that single word, don’t we?

It’s all too easy to get stuck in this mental cycle of thinking happiness will magically arrive once we get something we thought we wanted more than anything else—when we accomplish something we worked our asses off to get.

I’ll be happy when I get that promotion.

I’ll be happy when I buy that house.

I’ll be happy when I write that book.

Do we feel happy after obtaining or accomplishing any of these things? Not for very long. Like coming down from a high, we crash and we wonder where it all went wrong.

Hey, what happened to my happiness I deserve? I worked so hard for it, and now it’s gone.

The build-up we attach to thinking happiness comes after a certain thing causes this self-destructive roller coaster of emotions.

As a writer, I know this feeling well. And I see it all the time in other writers.


Okay, that’s the teaser for the guest blog post I wrote over at Chris Stocking’s place.

To celebrate the relaunch of his website, my good friend asked me and a couple of writers to kick off christopherstocking.com with some good old fashioned writing about writing.

Head on over, read the rest of the piece, and check out his new pad. (And, make sure to bring Chris some good beer, since I know he worked hard on everything.)

Cheers, Chris!

32 thoughts on “I’ll Be Happy When…

    • Britt Skrabanek says:

      Thanks so much, Stan. Absolutely. Loving and forgiving ourselves is imperative. We just don’t have space for anything else when we are suffocating ourselves with negativity.

  1. Clanmother says:

    A great post and dialogue. Happiness is a concept that is difficult to define for it encompasses all of human experience, much of which has unique qualities. I have found in my life, to feel happiness, I must embrace all of what life offers, both good and the not so good. Most of all, happiness comes from our participation within community. I always think of Marcel Proust’s words on happiness: “Let us be grateful to the people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.”

  2. Roy McCarthy says:

    Good post Britt, also good comment from Clanmother ^^ I reckon happiness – more accurately contentment I think – comes the moment you accept what you have and expect no more. Then you can absorb and appreciate your present world, not some mythical future one.

    • Britt Skrabanek says:

      Accepting and not expecting are key here, I agree, Roy. The mythical future world has a way of creeping in. But the times I’m present and not racing ahead are the absolute best.

  3. Minuscule Moments says:

    Great Read Britt you are way ahead than most people who wish to write just one book. Happiness is right there in front of us, some just can’t see it. I start by being thankful for the new sunrise, now that makes me plenty happy. I am still here.

  4. jmmcdowell says:

    Such wise words, Brit! I think Happiness often sneaks up on us when we’re not looking for it. And it will slip from our grasp if we try to hold on too tightly. I’ve tried to uncouple Happiness and Expectations from my writing, and I think it’s helping. Time will tell, of course!

    • Britt Skrabanek says:

      You said it best, honey! Happiness can sneak up on us and slip away if we’re not careful. I’m working on expectations with my writing as well, and it definitely helps. Keep doing it!

  5. Karin Van den Bergh says:

    Great post Britt and such wisdom! Yes, if happiness is not a ‘thing’ or a ‘destination’ it’s more about how much we enjoy and appreciate the journey, right? When I’m in doubt, I start singing and then I remember that saying; “I don’t sing because I’m happy. I’m happy because I sing”. And the singing can be replaced by anything you love to do..(writing 😉 )

    • Britt Skrabanek says:

      The journey is soooooooooooo important, but it’s all too easy to get caught up in the destination. I want to get there, something magical is going to happen then…and not until then. Of course, we’re missing it, aren’t we? That mentality causes us to miss out on the simple pleasure and pain of life.

      We’d all like to hear you sing in a vlog, please. 🙂

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